Have a Lollipop Day, Cupcake!

"...but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing." Psalm 34:10b

2012-02-15T10:14:00.007-06:00

Oh man. I have been extremely convicted lately about my attitude. I've also been completely overwhelmed by the goodness of God. It's amazing to me how interconnected these two things are. I haven't been overly negative or cynical or mean spirited or had a rotten disposition, but I have been anxious. That's disobedience. In Philippians Paul writes:

"do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." (Phil. 4:6)

We hear this part of Paul's letter to the Philippians quoted often. It's valuable. But it's not the only valuable information in Philippians 4. The verses around it say this:

"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." (Phil. 4:4-7)

Y'all, this is pretty much the instruction manual for living every day in relationship with Jesus.

"Rejoice in the Lord always."...no matter the circumstance. Always. Paul says it twice, so he must mean it.

"Let your reasonableness be known to everyone."...don't be ridiculous. Avoid unecessary drama. Flee from foolishness.

"The Lord is at hand"...God is here. For that reason...

"do not be anxious about anything"...why? Because God is here.

"but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God."...God doesn't have to wait for us to tell him what's going on. He already knows. This is for our benefit. So our minds will be aligned with the mind of God. Prayer puts us in conversation with Him. We speak but, more importantly, we also listen. Supplication means 'a humble entreaty or petition.' Through supplication, we are spilling our guts to God. Again, not because He doesn't already know, but sometimes it helps to just talk it out or write it out. Then, we're able to see what we're asking for. We see our desires and hopes and dreams. We can evaluate through scripture and the guiding of the Holy Spirit to see if they match up with God's will and His word. This also allows us to really give it over to God. It's easy to say we've given up control when we haven't really laid it all out. Talking to God about it allows us to be specific. Paul also says 'with thanksgiving'...so not only are we giving it all over to God, we're also thanking Him for what He's going to do in that situation. Before it happens. Why? Because that is what trust looks like. We are told time and time again in the Bible that God works for our good. Don't you believe that? I do. But I don't always act like it. By praying with thanksgiving, I'm further giving up control and saying "God, whatever you do in this situation, I know it will be Your will and for Your glory, so I'm thanking You in advance no matter the outcome."

"And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."...if you do all of the things above, God's peace will fill your life. Proverbs tells us to guard our hearts above everything else. 2 Corinthians tells us to take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ. Philippians is telling us that if we trust God completely, then He will do that for us! His peace will guard our hearts and our minds. Then we can rest.

Rest has been an ongoing theme in my life these days. Resting is not something that comes naturally to me. I'm not good at quiet. I'm not good at still. I'm good at busy. God wants me to rest in Him and in who He is. Part of resting in Him is trusting Him completely and then being content. I'm so quick to try and fix things myself instead of "letting go and letting God". When I give it to Him, that's it! I don't need to take it back. I laid it down because He can handle everything and I can handle nothing. When I pick it right back up, I'm saying that I don't really trust God to handle whatever it is that I'm dealing with. How foolish is that?! He's God! He can handle it and He does not need my help. He just needs my obedience. Charles Spurgeon said:

"Be wise and attend to the obeying, and let Christ manage the providing."

I can either be obedient and get to be a part of what God is doing, or I can be stubborn and in the way. God will still move. God will still work. God will still prevail. He does not need me. But He does delight in me and wants to use me for His glory. I love that moments of rest are written into the Psalms. I love the Psalms in general, but I particularly love the Selahs. Psalm 46 says this:

"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling. Selah" (Psalm 46:1-3)

Simple, right? God is here. God is God. THEREFORE we will not fear. Even if everything collapses around us, God is here. Selah. Rest. Psalm 46 goes on to say:

"The nations rage, the kingdoms totter; he utters his voice, the earth melts. The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
Come, behold the works of the LORD, how he has brought desolations on the earth. He makes wars cease to the end of the earth; he breaks the bow and shatters the spear; he burns the chariots with fire. "Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!" The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah" Psalm 46:6-11

God is here. So just rest. Be still. Trust. Give it up and don't try to take it back. Selah.

Earlier, I was reading Spurgeon's 'Meditation for this Morning', and I was once again in awe of the perfect sovereignty of my God. I'll leave you with Spurgeon's words today:

"To Him be glory both now and for ever." Will you not this day make it your prayer? "Lord, help me to glorify Thee; I am poor, help me to glorify Thee by contentment; I am sick, help me to give Thee honour by patience; I have talents, help me to extol Thee by spending them for Thee; I have time, Lord, help me to redeem it, that I may serve thee; I have a heart to feel, Lord, let that heart feel no love but Thine, and glow with no flame but affection for Thee; I have a head to think, Lord, help me to think of Thee and for Thee; Thou hast put me in this world for something, Lord, show me what that is, and help me to work out my life-purpose: I cannot do much, but as the widow put in her two mites, which were all her living, so, Lord, I cast my time and eternity too into Thy treasury; I am all Thine; take me, and enable me to glorify Thee now, in all that I say, in all that I do, and with all that I have."

Gratefulness Project--Part 2

2011-12-08T11:18:00.010-06:00

I'm back from New York City with a billion pictures to edit and post. Okay. Not a billion. It's probably closer to 400. Slight exaggeration...I'll put a couple throughout "the list".

My last portion led up to December, so I'll start this one with December 1st:

December 1: soup from Panera, a learning curve, familiarity, the unexpected

December 2: my commute, sparkling water, legs that work, the 9/11 Memorial

The "survivor tree"...it lived through the attacks.

December 3: Christmas decorations, new experiences, green-ness, jazz

At St. John's School

Lunch in Chinatown

Dizzy's Club Coca-Cola

December 4: sleeping in, a pumpernickle bagel with sun dried tomato cream cheese,
Biblical teaching, natural light

December 5: a friendly bus driver, having time, Smoothie King, my bed
December 6: Chick-fil-A, the staff at North Metro, breathing, sweaters
December 7: Garden Vegetable and Pesto soup (Panera), Cranberry Bliss Bar samples from Starbucks, being on time, fleeting sunlight, IMB Missionaries, water

Gratefulness Project--First Installment

2011-12-01T09:31:00.005-06:00

DON'T FRET! I AM STILL HERE!

I bet all of you (all 2 of you...) thought I had forgotten about my new project. Well, let me assure you, I have not! I actually love it. And I've had the chance to talk to a few people about it too. If you know me on a personal level at all, you know I love to talk. ;) So anyway, I have been wary of posting my daily lists on Twitter for fear of sounding just like everyone else in this holiday season. That's selfishness talking right there because I need to draw attention to the goodness of God whenever I can, so I'll try to be better about that.

If you remember, I started this the Tuesday before Thanksgiving. I was preparing to head back to Tennessee for the 3rd time this month, and though it is not a difficult trip, 3 trips of any kind within one month can be taxing. So I wanted to direct my attention to the positive when it could be so easy to dwell on the negative. I say this to in no way "toot my own horn" because I can guarantee that I am still a selfish (which you've already seen evidence of...), ungrateful, broken human. But I want to be different. So I'm changing something.

Here's my list in its simplest form:

November 22:

reminders, leftovers, cardigans, Heather Pierce

November 23:

ability, hot water, Emmett (my car), time zones

November 24:

old friends, new friends, sweet potatoes

November 25:

Erin Morris (soon to be Mrs. Kyle Grasham), plans, cameras, Egg Nog

November 26:

sweatpants, kittens, college football, my mom

November 27:

heat, America, coffee, North Metro Baptist Church

November 28:

"pixie power" (see below), tights, the Internet, pockets

November 29:

warmth, Twitter, Starbucks, brakes

November 30:

Emergen-C, bread, furry boots, community, Winston (my iPhone)

And now here we are at December 1. Crazy how fast time goes. Here are a couple of pictures pertaining to my list for your viewing pleasure. :)

With Erin Morris (soon to be Mrs. Kyle Grasham) after she asked me to be her maid of honor! [edited to protect THE DRESS]

The GIANT coffee mug the Barber's brought me back from Disney World! Her cup says "Pixie Power". [referenced on Nov. 28]

It really is hard for me to believe that it is December. It's also hard to believe that I moved south and I had to scrape ice off of my car this morning... ridiculous. I'm heading to New York City to visit my sister and brother-in-law tomorrow morning! So I will keep up with my listing and report back when I get home! Until then, feel free to follow me on Twitter for more frequent updates!

Love to all who read.

Alicia

Gratefulness Project

2011-11-22T08:39:00.002-06:00

Well hey! I'm deciding right now to start a project.

In recent days, i've become more and more addicted to Pinterest...which i'm sure many of you have heard of and seen by now... Anyway, I recently saw something on Pinterest that said "What if you woke up tomorrow with only the stuff you thanked God for today?" (or something like that. don't quote me.) And that got me thinking. How grateful am I? The answer is "not very" in case you were wondering. So many times I focus more on the negative than the positive, and isn't that just the opposite of how I should act as a child of God? So, I promise this has nothing to do with this being Thanksgiving week. It actually has not been planned or thought out or even dwelt upon. I just want to be more grateful and find the good in every day. This does not mean I'll be blogging every day. There's no way I would ever follow through with that. Haha. So I'm going to commit to posts once a week (at least), but I'm going to use the wonderful technology that is my iPhone and the Notes feature to make a list every day, which I will then share with you on a weekly basis. Maybe I'll tweet them too.
Please hold me to this. I never want to overlook the blessings of God because I am so caught up in this world.

Loves.

Everybody's doing it...

2011-09-12T10:30:00.003-05:00

I've been reading back over some of my previous posts, as well as reading some things my friends and favorite bloggers have posted recently. It's led me to one conclusion. I needed to blog. I wasn't sure what I should write about. Nothing gigantic or dramatic has happened in my life since I started my job with the GBC (going great by the way!). So I was at a loss. My writing spirit was awakened as I read an article on CNN about the dedication of the 9/11 memorial in New York City yesterday. You can find this article .'>here.

As I read, I was extremely convicted. I saw where a friend tweeted earlier today that, after seeing the images again all over the news yesterday, he finally felt the weight of that day. He said he had been in shock for the last 10 years. I think, in a way, I have been too. I was 14 on that day...sitting in World History at Sycamore High School in Pleasant View, TN. We watched the second plane hit. At 14. Of course I couldn't understand all of the implications of those events at the time. I just remember knowing it was bad.

10 years later, I realize the effect that day had on New York City, Washington D.C. and Shanksville, PA. I'll never be able to fully empathize or understand the way it felt for the people there because I wasn't there. I know that nothing I say could ever give them the comfort that they have searched for and will continue to seek. But I can offer all that I know, and that is Jesus. Jesus is our ezer kenegdo. Our Helper. The perfect fit to any situation we may be facing. When other people have no idea what to say or do, He does and He has and He will.

In thinking about how Jesus fits into every hole left after 9/11/01, I started thinking about how Jesus would respond...based on His character, His actions recorded in the Bible, His provision in my own life... This led to the deep conviction I felt while reading the above mentioned article. In the midst of reading about families attending memorials and the words of the current President and Vice President and Former Presidents, there were these statements:

"In all, 2,753 people died on two airplanes and on the ground when the planes slammed into the World Trade Center towers, causing their collapse. That total does not include the 10 al Qaeda hijackers on board the planes."

followed later by...

"The total number of dead in New York, Washington and Pennsylvania was 2,977 people, not including 19 hijackers."

The words that broke my heart here may surprise you. While I recognize the grief associated with the huge numbers of victims, my heart aches for the parts that say "...does not include the 10..." and "...not including 19...". Why? Why aren't they included in the totals? They died in New York, Washington and Pennsylvania too. It is unrealistic of me to think that the 2,977 victims were all believers. It is possible, but not probable. As a Christian, I can't help but think that some of them are probably in hell. That may sound harsh, but it's true. As an American, I can see reasoning behind a division in the dead. Victims vs Terrorists. That one's not hard. However, my allegiance is first and foremost to Jesus, and, as a Christian, I cannot fathom Him making divisions within human lives lost. My God is Love. His heart had to hurt when any of those lives ended as he saw His creation mourning and grieving. His only distinction between any of us is lost or saved.

The Bible says, The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but
is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all
should reach repentance." (2 Peter 3:9)

...Not wishing that ANY should perish. That includes people who hijack planes and crash them into buildings. This is hard for me to comprehend because their actions made (and continue to make) me angry. But the Lord does not see sin like I see sin. He sees my sin as equal to their sin. He has forgiven me and removed my sin from me "as far as the east is from the west" (Psalm 103:12). He could've removed their sin too, if they had asked. Nothing is too big for God. No sin is too great. The only thing that sends us to hell is the rejection of the free gift offered to us in the sacrifice of the spotless Lamb of God.

God doesn't look at the people living on Earth and see Arabs and Anglos and Chinese and African. He sees those that are covered by the blood of Jesus and those that are not. I am so guilty of oftentimes letting my American-ness get ahead of my Christian-ness. I am a citizen of the Kingdom of God who happens to live in America. My allegiance to Christ would not change based on my geographical location. I would do well to remember that.

For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; for the same Lord is
Lord of all, bestowing his riches on all who call on him. For "everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved." (Romans 10:12-13 )

There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free,
there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. (Galatians 3:28)

Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised,
barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all. (Colossians 3:11)

BIG NEWS!!

2011-08-04T13:17:00.002-05:00

Hi friends, followers, random visitors, people searching for cupcake recipes and finding my blog instead...

As you can see in the title, I have some news. I wanted to tell as many people at once as possible, and this seemed like the easiest way.

Many of you know that I've been outside of Atlanta since May working at North Metro Baptist Church with the girls in the Student Ministries. It's been such an amazing experience, and I've built some incredible, lasting friendships here. Before coming on board at North Metro, I was looking pretty seriously for a job in the Atlanta area. I had some interviews, but nothing that I really felt like I would enjoy doing. I was looking here because I felt like God was bringing my time in Nashville to a close for this season of my life. I'm not sure why or for how long, but I know that Tennessee is not where I can be most effective for the Kingdom right now. So I came here.

Thanks to Maclane (the Student Pastor here) and some incredible, encouraging contacts I've made here at the church, I kept my eyes and ears open for job opportunities in this area. About two weeks ago, I had an interview with the Georgia Baptist Convention. I am very excited to tell you all that I got the job! And I'll be staying in the Lawrenceville/Buford/Suwanee/etc area! I'm also going to be as involved as I can be with the Girls' Ministry at North Metro, and teaching 11th Grade Girls Sunday School this fall. I'm really, really excited about being able to put down roots here. The people in this church are amazing, and there is an incredible mission field here in Georgia. I believe that God has put me here at this time for a specific reason, and I'm so excited about it!

My actual job at the GBC is in the Information Services Department, so I'm looking forward to learning new things and being able to equip pastors and church staff members around the state to do effective and exciting ministry! I'll start there full-time on the 15th, and I cannot wait!

Staying here is bittersweet because I've never really lived anywhere other than Nashville. My family is there, so I will always be able to visit and "go home" for holidays and special occasions, but it won't be the same as living down the road. There will be some adjustments, but I know the Lord can and will see me through whatever I encounter because He has a plan and hems me in behind and before. I am so thankful for this opportunity, and I cannot wait to see what God has in store for me!

Thank you all for your support and prayers. Please continue! Love you more than you know.

Alicia

Luau!!

2011-07-27T13:08:00.003-05:00

Hey pals. So I'm really excited about something and I wanted to share my joy and excitement with you! Here in the North Metro Student Ministries office, we're planning a luau. The Wednesday night before all of our students go back to school, we're getting together on the volleyball courts and fields, grilling out, playing games and wearing grass skirts. Well, the grass skirt part may not be entirely true... Hawaiian shirts will most definitely be making an appearance though. Fo Sho. I can assure you of this because the music is being provided by an "Old Man Band". This name was lovingly bestowed upon a makeshift band we've developed over the last month or so because it is comprised of a lot of dads. Aside from me and a guy named Eric who is about my age, the youngest guy has a middle school daughter... Hence the name "Old Man Band". (I've also been told there are some younger men in our church who dubbed themselves the "Boy Band", and that may have contributed to the name as well.) Anyway, with age comes experience. And talent. And jokes. So we have had the most fun practicing and playing all the songs we're going to do for the Luau. I mentioned at rehearsal yesterday that this is like a dream come true for me. haha. I get to sing all the cool songs (Heatwave, Locomotion, Proud Mary, etc...) in a setting that isn't karaoke or my car or the shower. We're doing summertime classics plus some other songs just for fun. It's such a pleasant atmosphere to be in too. All of these guys are so talented and committed. They take time out of the regularly scheduled lives to work on songs for a student event. I appreciate them more than I can say. I hope they're having fun too. I think they are. I know I am.

Island Blessings to you and yours. :)

Alicia

ps. August 3. 6:30-8:00, if you're interested.

Disorganization.

2011-06-06T13:49:00.005-05:00

Of space. Of thoughts. Of time...
...and so it begins. The summer of interning. I am so so so tired. Not because of anything that's happened in the last few days...just because of life catching up with me. I need like a whole day devoted to sleeping. That's not happening this week though. We're full swing into VBS at North Metro, so every day this week we have 600+ children running around the campus. Tonight is the first night of a Senior/College Girls' Bible Study. Tomorrow night is a bible study that I go to every other Tuesday night. So it will be at least Wednesday before I can breath. And to top off the week, we have a middle school lock in this Friday from 10pm to 8am. haha. I'm planning on napping as often as possible.

There's been a topic that keeps popping up at various times and places in my life lately. It's the fact that students -- or girls in particular -- don't understand the reasons they should guard their hearts and their bodies. It raises the question of how much a student pastor or church staff member or Sunday school teacher should get involved, and how much should be left to parents. There is no guarantee that a student is being raised by godly parents or that their parents are willing, able and anxious to talk to them about issues of the heart. However, there are parents in this world that would be offended if their student's youth pastor started addressing the way they dress or speak or present themselves. It's a delicate balance, but the issue is one that we cannot ignore.
As a girl, I have no idea how boys think no matter what age they are. I can assure you that, as a teenager, I did not make decisions based on how my actions would affect my brothers in Christ. I didn't even think about it until my youth pastor or Sunday school teacher drew my attention to it. Sometimes girls argue that the boys are to blame for not being in close enough relationship to the Lord. At the same time, boys argue that it is the girls' responsibility to not draw their minds to any place that is impure. The fact is, it's everyone's "fault". It is the responsibility and privilege of every Christian to draw people to the Lord. Not to themselves. Not to a place of inappropriate thoughts or actions or lifestyles. To Christ. People should look at me and see Him -- not what I'm wearing or how I'm behaving. So it is up to me to be close enough to God for that to happen. As a person who is involved with student ministry everyday, it is also my responsibility to encourage students to draw near to Him as well. In Colossians, Paul writes "If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God...Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry...Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony." (3:1-3,5,12-14) So many times we give lists and lists and lists of "don'ts" without ever addressing the "dos". Paul gives the Colossians a list of things they should give up and avoid. BUT then he gives them a list of things they should strive for. The mistake that is often made is that we tell students what they should not do...giving them reasons like "you might get pregnant", "you'll miss out on your childhood", "people will think bad things about you". We never tell them that they should strive for a closer relationship with the Lord because He is goodness and mercy and faithfulness and the meeter of all of our needs--physical, emotional, or spiritual. No one tells students that there is so much joy in knowing you're in the center of God's will that can never be found by doing things our own way. No one says that being in close relationship with God brings fulfillment that cannot be found in any earthly relationship. No one tells them that the Lord designed them individually and specifically for a purpose that He has set out for them. Or that friendships based in a shared desire to be like Jesus are so much closer and valuable than friendships based on earthly commonalities. Instead we list of things they shouldn't do because we say so or because it's frowned upon. We focus too much on issues without digging deeper in our study of scripture.
The thing is, if we show students or adults or children or anyone the importance of being in the Word and finding out more about the character of Jesus, all those other things will fall into place. If your heart is in the right place, you'll dress appropriately, speak appropriately, act appropriately...because your goal will be to do the will of God. All of your decisions will begin to revolve around the Lord. Through prayer and practice, we can align our desires with those of God. It's not easy. You can't sit down for the first time and expect to spend an hour or two in intense prayer and Bible Study. You have to practice. Start small. The Lord will give you strength and endurance. Let me assure you that I am preaching as much to myself as anyone. Maybe more. So if your focus and end goal is to please the Lord, you won't have to worry about your behavior being a distraction to another Christian. If you spend more time with Jesus, you'll begin to look like Him. And that will attract others to you. And your presence will draw people to God. To put it in Sunday School terms...you can go from being a stumbling block to being a stepping stone.
We need to value and encourage right relationships with the Lord. Focus on getting the hearts of people in the right place, and trust that the Lord can change their desires and actions and lives. We, as Christians, need to live like the Bride that we are...awaiting our Bridegroom--Jesus Christ. We need to honor and love and be loyal to Jesus first--submitting to His authority and wisdom and leading. He will take care of the rest. We just have to stop being so stubborn and arrogant.
...
Obviously this is not a complete thought process. Just thinking via blogger for the time being. Feel free to share your thoughts or ideas or criticisms. I'm friendly. :)

Until next time friends.

oh, heeeeeyyyyyy!

2011-05-31T09:59:00.007-05:00

Hello world. I write to you as I sit in the intern office at North Metro First Baptist Church of Gwinnett, Inc. (fondly referred to as "North Metro"). I could go back and recount to you everything that has happened between my last post and now, but that would probably take a full 3 months. So I'll hit the high points. You're welcome.
The week before Easter, I brought my mom to Atlanta to see "The Final Season of the Atlanta Passion Play". This meant I got to see most of my friends from my first internship in Atlanta, and got to spend some more time in this beautiful city. I went back to Nashville knowing that the Lord was trying to tell me something. I went back to work at J. Alexander's on Monday morning, and it was honestly like I was having an out of body experience and watching everything happen around me. That next Wednesday night, I had the same experience at The Fellowship at Two Rivers (that's my Nashville church's new name...more on that later). I went through praise team and choir practice and sound check for Easter, but it never really felt real to me. The only thing I could figure out was that maybe God was trying to wrap up my time in Nashville. For now. I can't tell you if I'll live there again because I don't know. I started looking for jobs in Atlanta, set up some interviews, and drove back and forth between Nashy and the ATL a lot. Like...A LOT. Like...once a week for 3 weeks. True story. As I prepared to come to Atlanta for a second interview with a company, I was talking with Maclane (student pastor at North Metro) about moving to Atlanta and what I was looking for. He presented me with the option of coming to North Metro and working with him to build and grow a Girl's Ministry within the student ministry. It's funny that that's what I'm doing now because 3 years ago, I didn't know Girl's Ministry existed.
Anyway, everything happened very quickly. I met with Maclane on a Wednesday, May 4. He called me to offer me the position on Saturday, the 7th. I went to J's later that day to talk to Richard (my service manager) about leaving and put in my 2 weeks' notice. And I cried. Then I got in the car and I sobbed. It was rough. That place has been the one constant in my life for 2.5 years. THAT'S A LONG TIME! I joked a lot about just putting a bed in the back because I spent so much time there, but honestly it was kind of like a second home and a second family. I love the people there so so so much. Over the next two weeks, Maclane found me a family to live with, and I prepared to leave Nashville. So on Friday, May 20, I worked my last shift at J's and cried a lot more. The next day, I packed up my car and drove to Lawrenceville, GA to the home of David and Lynette Barber, whom I had never met before. My first day at North Metro was the next morning which also happened to be Senior Recognition Sunday, so I met about a billion people.
It's been 11 days since I moved. I feel like I've known David and Lynette and their 3 gorgeous kids forever, and they've done an amazing job of making me feel at home. I'm getting into a routine at the church. I was only here for 5 days before trekking back to Tennessee for my aunt's wedding, but I'm back here now until August. At least. I'd love to be here long term, full time, permanently. Not necessarily doing exactly this, but I'm open to opportunities and possibilities. I've learned to not put limits on God and what He can and will do. Right when I think nothing will happen, He blows my mind again. I love that.
So right now... I'm so excited about meeting and investing in the lives of these girls this summer. They've been through a lot as a student ministry, and I'm so honored that the Lord is allowing me to be here and love on them! Everyone here has been so cordial and welcoming and wonderful. I could not ask for a better situation, and I am so grateful.
Stay tuned...
Alicia

P.S. here are some shots from the most perfect wedding in the history of the world...
Me and Alayna at the Rehearsal Dinner

Amy had these made for all the girls...and they were necessary!

A shot of the program...

The most beautiful bride:

Being introduced as "Mr. and Mrs. Dale Massey"...

Bliss.

Blarg.

2011-02-25T02:10:00.002-06:00

Day 4(.5?) of no bread/potatoes/chips/fries/etc... I'm not dead. I figured my body might go into shock from the complete change in dietary habits. As I have mentioned before, I like bread. It's my second favorite food (the first is cheese). :) It's not only delicious, it's also typically the most convenient option. So i've had to consciously and intentionally not eat bread this week. I've discovered so far that Jesus is the bread of life...the tortilla chips of life...the oatmeal cream pies of life... Lucky for me, He is everything and I need nothing but Him. He's been so good to me, so oftentimes I also want for nothing because of Him. Thank you, Jesus. I don't deserve You.

'tis all.

P.S. in totally unrelated news, i loathe ironing.

Midnight Ramblings

2011-02-21T00:56:00.003-06:00

I'm currently gorging myself on an obscene amount of tortilla chips. Why? I'm giving up carbs for 20 days as part of a time of prayer and fasting that my whole church is doing this month. It starts tomorrow. We don't have to give up carbs, but I figured I need to view Jesus more as my "bread of life" than I have been recently...and this will hopefully be an excellent representation. It's definitely not going to be easy. I love carbs. I've oftentimes asked for an all-carb diet. It's my comfort food, my discomfort food, my tired food, my happy food, my bored food, my cheaper than everything else and i'm broke food. I'm hoping and anticipating that God can and will do big things through this. I'm too dependent on myself. I have a hard time letting go. I've found that delegating is one of my least favorite things to do. It means I have to trust people and what they're going to do. I'd much rather do it all myself so I know when and how things are being accomplished. However, God has been giving me tons of opportunities to delegate recently. He's funny like that. In that same vein...giving up carbs for any period of time is not going to be easy...mainly because I work in a restaurant where I have easily accessible carbs being paraded around me at all times. The good news is, this restaurant also has wonderful carb-free food. It's better for me anyway. Isn't it funny how God uses things like carbohydrates to teach me lessons about His character? I love that. Anyway, I'll try to keep you updated throughout the next 20 days. Peace be with you all.

Slow down for just a minute, life...

2010-09-14T00:31:00.002-05:00

Hey. Hope all is well with everyone out there. I am doing pretty well these days. Still at J's. Still teaching color guard at Page 2 days a week. Still at Two Rivers. Still struggling to be who God has called me to be everyday to everybody in every situation.
Today, I worked 12.5 hours in the restaurant, and let's just say we were slow enough that the monetary benefits were not great. However, I got to experience something wonderful today. One of my tables during the lunch shift was a couple with 2 small, special needs children and 2 older gentlemen who also had special needs. The couple was very nice, and surprisingly low maintenance. I wasn't sure how to respond to the other four at the table, so I just went off of how everyone responded and thought about how I'd want to be treated if the roles were reversed. Apparently, this family comes in about once a month. Sometimes they have the 2 kids with them, sometimes it's 4, sometimes it's a whole slew of people... They order pretty much the same things every time they're in, so they knew exactly what they wanted when they sat down. I tried to be as accommodating as possible, asking questions when I was unsure, and treating everyone equally. I brought extra ketchup and refilled iced teas and water glasses. Nothing special. No complications I had to work with. No belligerent guests. Their meal was uneventful. However, when I came to the table to clear away some of the dishes, there was $6 laying on it. The lady said that money was for me from "the boys" Brian and Malcolm--the two older, special needs gentlemen. I said "Oh! That's for me?" and they both nodded their heads and said "Yeah, yeah, for you." I said "Thank you so much!" and walked away. I had made it about 5 feet before I nearly collapsed in a puddle of tears on the floor. I was overwhelmed. When I came back to the table one last time to drop off their credit card and say thank you, "the boys" both shook my hand and told me thank you. It made me think about how often I take my life for granted. I've never struggled with major health issues. Neither has anyone in my immediate family. We're very lucky, and so many times we're concerned about what type of bottled water we drink or something else that's ridiculously trivial. Spending that little time with that family today made me so thankful for my health and mental stabilities and for being able to go out to eat and order for myself and tip my servers. I was immediately thankful for that couple and the gentleness and love they displayed for the people they had brought to lunch. It was apparent that everyone feels like an equal part of that family, and it was a blessing for me to get to see into their lives for just a little while. I can only hope that they were blessed by me today too, because they sure did change my whole day.

Long time, no post

2010-07-15T00:48:00.002-05:00

Hello All...All 6 or 7 of you. :) I am tired. I'm a tired girl. I need to be sleeping right now, but I rarely have computer access through any avenue except my iPhone, and let's be honest...who wants to write a whole blog post from their iPhone. Not me.

Why am I tired, you may ask? Well I suppose I will tell you. I'll try to keep it brief and non-complainy. I work a lot. I love my job and 95-98% of the people I work with/for, but I do spend just about as much time at the restaurant as I do at home...wherever home is... haha. I'm a bit of a nomad these days until I figure out the grad school/student loan/whatever else situation.

After I graduated from Belmont, I moved home. I knew that wouldn't last long, so I started staying at my sister and brother-in-law's house in April. What started out as me staying there when I worked late and had to be back early the next morning turned into me having 2 crazy little roommates who were married and related to me. It was an adventure... one that ended with Amanda asking me to move to New York with her and Chris when they go so I can be their roommate. No thank you. :)

When they left the country for their current escapades in Central America, I moved back home for about 3.5 days. Since then, I've been living with Chris's parents. Yep. My sister's in-laws. They're out of town a lot this summer, and it works out better for all parties if I just stay here. It's closer to work, closer to friends, and they don't have to pay a house-sitter or ask a neighbor to feed the cat every other week. So it works out.

Now that the story of my nomad-ness is complete (for now), I'll continue the "why is alicia tired?" saga:
For the past 3ish weeks, my sweet little grandmother has been battling pneumonia. She was sick at home for a week, sick and then recovering in the hospital for a week, and then came back home to continue her recovery on Friday. She's lost a significant amount of weight, and is all around pretty weak...so it helps her out to have someone at the house with her. She can't be up all day fixing her meals or doing laundry and the dishes, so my mom and her brothers and sisters have all been taking off work so they could stay with her and help out. Yesterday and today, I took my turn. My days went something like this: get very little sleep, help fix breakfast, try to eat my breakfast while running back and forth to Nanny's room getting her whatever she needed/wanted, fixing lunch, eating lunch, sneaking little naps, running some more, answering the phone, calling my mom to see where to find something, making sure the chickens and the dogs and the cats are fed and watered, etc... and on Tuesday, I got myself ready and to work on time where I trained a new server and then did cashouts--meaning I was there from 4:45 until 11:45. It was a lengthy day, and Wednesday I got to do it all over again minus the job. Don't get me wrong. I love my grandmother very, very, very much, and it physically pains me to see her so weak and frail. I can definitely understand why my mom and aunts have been taking shifts though. Taking care of any other human being is hard work and does not include instant gratification.

That's a lot like life in general though when you're just taking care of yourself. Dieting and working out brings delayed results. Studying for classes and exams...delayed results. Investing in the lives of those around you...delayed results. Being faithful in my relationship with Jesus...delayed results. In a society that is so obsessed with instant everything, it's ironic (but also a bit exciting) that the best things in life--the blessings--rarely come instantly. That proves the faithfulness of God (as if He needed proof). Just another picture of how deep and wide and great the Father's love is for us...and how intricate and perfectly designed. Thank you, Jesus.

oh, hey 2010!

2010-01-04T16:31:00.002-06:00

so this one time, i graduated from Belmont... it was pretty awesome and overwhelming. and now everyone is asking me what i'm doing now. I really just want to hang out with my friends in various assorted cities around the country... so i think that's what i'm going to do. Katie is in Lynchburg. Erin and Brittany are in Denver. There are so many wonderful people in Atlanta (mainly the Haines sibs, Brandy, Amanda, Maddie, etc :]). Erin could possibly be in Seattle in June, so I might go there to see her. I just want to work and make money and travel for a little while. I don't want to miss Alayna's last semester of high school or Autumn's experience with her driving permit(which she got today...wow I am old.) or any part of my grandmother's or cousins' lives. Mom and I might drive to Arkansas to see my aunt, uncle and cousins who are building yet another house. I'm excited about opportunities like this. I need to get my schedule changed at work so I have more of a travel friendly one...
Terra Nova 09/10 just ended and I met some absolutely incredible people that I'm really really excited about starting friendships with. I also got to spend some time with old friends I haven't seen in too long, and that was good too! I'm probably going to try to go to Haiti this year too, so add that to my travel list. :) So far I have: Atlanta, Lynchburg, Denver (when it's warmer...), Seattle, Haiti, Arkansas, maybe Texas and definitely random parts of Tennessee. I'm going to have a good year. I'm determined. God is good, so what else matters? Loves.

Ch ch ch changes...

2009-12-07T11:45:00.003-06:00

1. My little sister was at TN Tech on a college visit Monday.
2. My littlest sister is getting her permit over Christmas break.
3. I just signed up for my "big girl" e-mail address. The only other ones I have are my 6th grade original and my college e-mail. Until now!
4. I got my final hour of convocation credit Friday night at Allison's dance recital. If you don't go to Belmont, you will never understand how big of a deal this is.
5. Sunday night, I was inducted in the Alpha Sigma Tau Alumnae Organization. The biggest changes here are that I now have Sunday nights free, and annual dues are around 650-700 dollars cheaper. :)
6. I'm finished with one class. 5 to go.
7. A teacher who has been telling us all semester not to say we're graduating, but instead we're PLANNING on graduating because they could still fail us...told me today that she'll be the one yelling "hooty hoo! hooty hoo!" when I walk on Friday night. Guess that means she's not failing me!
8. Stuff is starting to come off the walls and be packed up in the apartment. LJ leaves in 6 days. I leave in 9.
9. My body is proving consistent this year in that my allergies just kicked in this week. Yep. I have allergies as fall changes to winter and everything dies. I'm a season ahead of everyone else.
10. I'm mailing my Christmas cards/Newsletters/Graduation announcements today. That kind of makes it real.

On an unrelated note: My future husband (assuming he exists) better know how to iron things for himself, because working at J. Alexander's has brought me to a place where I detest ironing.

13 November 2009

2009-11-13T01:34:00.003-06:00

Things that I like:
1. Evanescence
2. Vegetables
3. Carrot Cake
4. Britney Knoeck
5. Some of my co-workers
6. The prospect of living through the next week
7. Options
8. Looking on the bright side
9. John Mayer [specifically because of "In Your Atmostphere"]
10. My sisters
11. Allison Hill
12. Reading my friends' blogs...whether they are near friends, far away friends, or in between
13. Lists
14. Full tanks of gas
15. Chocolate
16. Knowing how to write an annotated bibliography
17. Acoustic Guitar
18. Harmony
19. Disonance
20. Sweatpants
21. Being clean
22. Water
23. Sleep
24. Sleep.
25. goodnight.

"Top 3 favorite albums??" "That's SOOO belmont..."

2009-11-08T17:45:00.001-06:00

This weekend, in congruence with my unintentional plan to be gone every stinkin weekend...I went to a monastery with my Church History class. Yep. You read that right.

Saturday morning at 7:45am, we met outside the religion building to set off on our jouney. We split up into 2 vans: Dr. Bell's van and the Party Van(<<--my obvious choice). Our group was comprised of 15 students, Dr. Bell, Jacquie (our teaching assistant) and David (Dr. Bell's 18yearold son). It was quite an adventure!
Dr. Bell's van passed the 3+ hours by playing Theologian Bingo and holding a Fantasy Theology Draft. The Party Van [me, Will, Stephanie, Bennett, Michelle, Mark, David, Jessica, and Juli] passed the time by getting to know one another through listing all of our favorite things. :) I learned A LOT about my classmates. Mostly stuff about my accountabilibuddy, Will, but some about my other van-mates too.
When we arrived in Bardstown, Kentucky (ironically the bourbon capital of the world...), we parked and split up for lunch. Rest assured that Mexican food is pretty much the same everywhere you go. Our server, Victor, made our experience though.
We were supposed to be at the monastery by 2:15 for "None", the 5th prayer time of the day. We got there a little early, so we spent some time in the gift shop. [yes they have a gift shop. they also make fudge and cheese. visit www.monks.org for more info. no lie.] I recently went to "Night Prayers" at a local convent with my friend Nathan, and I am so glad that I did! I at least knew a little of what to expect when we got to the monastery.
After "None", we watched an informational video about The Abbey at Gethsemani, and then an 80+ year old monk named Brother Renee who had been at the abbey for 60 years told us a little about his experience. He was the most precious little man! He also had some valuable information to share with us. He told us the story of when he first came to the abbey. He went in to visit with his abbot one day, and the abbot said: "There are only two people here: You and Jesus." Brother Renee said he had found this to be true no matter where he was! He asked us what Jesus would say if he hit any of us with his cane. [hahaha] After answers of "stop." "don't do that." and "please don't do that again.", he told us Jesus would say "Ouch." Think about that for a second...
Brother Renee was making the point that Jesus told us whatever we do, we should do it unto Him. So he sees everyone as Jesus, especially since Christians are all part of one body of Christ. He treats everyone like he would treat Jesus. I love this. So so wise. He read us some of the things he had written about their beliefs and his personal experience, and we enjoyed our time with him very much!
After that, we still had about an hour before "Vespers" at 5:30, so we went on a hike...when I say "hike" I mean "run" because Dr. Bell is over a foot taller than me and moves briskly through the woods. haha. He took us to see these statues on the property that were donated to the abbey. They were statues of Jesus and His 3 besties: Peter, James and John in the Garden of Gethsemani. The disciples were depicted as being asleep about 50 yards from where Jesus was praying in anguish. It was a beautiful depiction and well worth the out of breath-ness it took me to get there.
We went to Vespers, and it seemed significantly longer than None...mostly because all of us were quite hungry and praying our stomachs wouldn't growl loudly during the periods of silence. :)
Luckily, our next move was back into town to check into the hotel and then onward to dinner. A group of us ate at the Old Talbott Tavern which apparently has tons of history. Just ask their informative pamphlet. haha. The food was amazing, and Tyler and I made friends with our server, "Biz". [it's short for Elizabeth. cute, right?] Then we went back to the hotel where about 15 of us gathered in my room for "BEYOND BALDERDASH". I'll be purchasing this game soon. It's stinkin' fun! Mark and Jessica won but only because it's a "Dusing Family Tradition" and Mark has played tons and tons of times. Andrew Hill and I made up quite a team, and were most excited about our team name: AlAn. :) Get it??
After some much needed rest, we checked out of the hotel around 10am and headed for Mass at the monastery. We went in after everyone else because Dr. Bell likes to sit in the monks' stalls when he's there. ;) Those wooden seats are pretty hard, but they encourage good posture. Mass was a wonderful experience and the homily [which is the sermon portion] was really great!
After Mass, Dr. Bell has arranged for us to have lunch at a place called the Kurtz Restaurant. It was a home-cookin' place right across the street from Stephen Foster's "Old Kentucky Home". [google it.] My grandmother would be disappointed to know that I was so close and didn't get to go visit. :( I'll have to go back. Lunch was delicious and overly filling. We definitely enjoyed the conversation and even sang Happy Birthday to my friends Nathan who turned 23 today, and Aaron whose birthday was yesterday.
Then we headed home. Most of us tried to sleep to no avail. Sometimes there's just no good way to sleep in a van unless you cuddle with your seat neighbors. We got to know each other better, but not that good!
Overall, it was an unexpectedly wonderful experience! I am so glad to know the people who went with me. We're all looking forward to the class more now. We said we wished the trip had happened sooner since we all enjoy each other's company so much! Class will be more fun now...not that church history isn't buckets of fun already... ;)

At this particular moment, I'm fighting my tiredness by heading to Bongo to eat/drink caffiene with Heather. Then it's on to AST's weekly meeting. In the morning I get to see Katherine Jones Wallace when we have breakfast at Crema!!!! So excited about her being in town and getting to see her!!!!

In the words of the monks: "Thanks be to God."
"May the peace of the Lord be with you..."

Alicia and Jesus

2009-11-06T15:15:00.000-06:00

So this summer, I went to see "Julie and Julia" with my amazing friends in Atlanta [Hunter, Anna, Hutch, Noelle, and one of Noelle's friends]. It was wonderful! We all loved it and decided it made us hungry. haha. One of the things I loved about that movie was the main character. She was FAR from perfect or Hollywood's definition of "hott", but she was easy to love and relate to which (combined with her enchanted looks...lol.) made her beautiful. She was unhappy with the way her life was going, so she decided to give herself a challenge. She wanted to cook all of the recipes in Julia Childs' cookbook within a year. I won't tell you how it goes in case you haven't seen it, but it's quite an adventure!
Recently, I've been pretty stressed out and busy and crazy and running around like a chicken with no head [or a lizard with no tail...does that one work? probs not. oh well]. I've been in a funk. I can't tell you when it started, what prompted it, or what the general cause is. I just know I don't like it. So in an effort to get out of this funk...I'm giving myself a challenge. A few years ago, I was given a Bible that gives you something to read for everyday of the year. It's divided into days, not books and chapters, and there's an Old Testament and a New Testament selection for each day. They go in order...kind of, but by the end of the year, you'll have read the entire Bible. It starts [obviously] on January 1, but since this isn't January and I don't want to wait that long...I started today on November 6. I like it.
My challenge to myself is to keep it up. I want...no. NEED. to read the Bible every day. This not only gives me yet another reason to do so, but also takes out anything that could be considered work. The days are layed out for me. All I have to do is read. Sounds easy, right?? I hope it will be. Today it was: Jeremiah 50:24-51:32; Psalm 119:113-120; Proverbs 26:24-26; and Hebrews 2:10-3:11. Carrying this Bible around with me adds a little extra weight to my backpack, but hey. Jesus carried a cross. I can carry another Bible.

In other news:

I'm taking a class called "Spirituality in World Religions" this semester. There are some people in my class that are seriously harboring bitterness and resentment towards God and anything that could be of Him. If you would, join me in praying for them. And pray for me to not have angry thoughts towards them or say anything I don't actually mean that could contribute to the bitterness.
My friend Rob Adams [we work together at J. Alexander's] is dealing with the death of his mother this weekend. She has been sick for some time, and passed away yesterday morning. I'm going to visitation at the funeral home this afternoon. Rob is in his 20's and spent a significant amount of time caring for his mother before her death, so this will not only be an adjustment in his heart, but also in his daily life as well. So be praying for him too please.
I'm working on making plans/ideas for post December. The plan so far is: Graduation, December 18. That's pretty much all I've got.
I have an overnight field trip for my Church History class tomorrow and Sunday. We're going to a monastery in Kentucky, so it should be a good time! haha.

Love to all who read. May your lives be filled with the goodness of the Lord.

Atlanta makes my heart happy.

2009-11-02T11:42:00.001-06:00

I was there this weekend--this MORNING even! I haven't much time to tell you all about it just now...but here's a snippet. These people made my day yesterday. Love that Haines fam. :)

Oh Heavenly Day...All the clouds rolled away...

2009-09-16T00:08:00.000-05:00

...Got no trouble today. :) What a good song! I don't know who sings it, but I know it was the theme song of my weekend. My sister got MARRIED on Saturday! Wow. That's weird. Amanda has a husband. Everything about Saturday was absolutely perfect! ...her dress, our dresses, the church, the fresh lavender, the reception, the music, the company, the adorable photographer... It was a Heavenly Day! I'm so thankful that the Lord has blessed Amanda with someone who compliments her so well. I know that Chris loves her so much, and I trust him completely to take care of and love her. So I cried all day Saturday, but they were definitely tears of joy and tears that reflected the change in my life. I'm used to Chris being a part of our family. I'm not used to having a brother. Or a different last name than Amanda. That is so odd. I jokingly said my parents were actually smart when they gave us all the same middle name. Even though she changed one, she didn't change them both! So, until I get married, we still share one name. That is comforting. :)
I feel like/know that my life has all but revolved around this wedding since the day I got back from Atlanta. No joke. My mom, aunt, and I were talking on Sunday about how we sort of had this "after Christmas" feeling that day. We were exhausted, of course, but also depressed. What do we do now?? There's nothing fun to look forward to! Only things to catch up on, and the mundane routine of everyday life to fall back into. Today was Autumn's 15th birthday though, so that was exciting. She got great gifts! She's a smart girl, and knows what to ask for. I remember being 15 and still wanting finger nail polish and silly movies for my birthday. Autumn asked for a promise ring. haha. I love how different all 4 of us are, but we still share the occasional similarity. It keeps life interesting, that's for sure!
Next week is AST's recruitment, so there's at least one more exciting thing to look forward to and do before I go back to work at J. Alexander's.
Thoughts about post-grad: flight attendant? cruiseline employee? grad school? this is all post-living in Atlanta for at least a season ideas. :) more to come...

where have i even stood but the shores along Your ocean

2009-08-10T10:14:00.000-05:00

There's been a recurring theme in my summer. How fun is that?! haha. Other than exhaustion, my recurring thoughts have been about holiness--what it is, what it looks like, what it isn't, etc. It's a big concept! One that I'm sure I'll be learning about for all of eternity. There's a song I want to share with you. If you want to put it on your itunes, it's called "What Do I Know of Holy?" and it's by Addison Road. The lyrics are as follows:

I've made You promises a thousand times
I tried to hear from heaven, but I talked the whole time
I think I made You too small
I never feared You at all, No
If You touched my face, would I know You?
Looked into my eyes, could I behold You?
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood,
but the shores along your ocean?
Are You fire?
Are You fury?
Are You sacred?
Are You beautiful?
What do I know?
What do I know of holy?
I guess I thought that I had figured You out.
I knew all the stories, and I learned to talk about
How You were mighty to save
But those were only empty words on a page.
Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be.
The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees.
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood,
but the shores along your ocean?
Are You fire?
Are You fury?
Are You sacred?
Are You beautiful?
What do I know?
What do I know of holy?
What do I know of holy?
What do I know of wounds that would heal my shame?

And a God who gave life its name?

What do I know of holy?

Of the one who the angels praise?

All creation knows Your name.

On earth and heaven above,

What do I know of this love?

What do I know of You

Who spoke me into motion?

Where have I even stood,

but the shores along your ocean?

Are You fire?

Are You fury?

Are You sacred?

Are You beautiful?

What do I know?

What do I know of holy?

I love that song. It's quite the convictor... I'm not sure if that's a word or not, but whatevs. I'm excited about what else I can learn about holiness. I know it's something I'll never be able to grasp, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to try. It's one of those things that could be completely overwhelming and completely reassuring all at the same time. Crazy. Speaking of crazy...I'm reading "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan right now. Parker read it, loved it, and suggested I read it too. So far so good. I have to finish it by Friday because it belongs to Amanda, and I'm leaving Atlanta on Saturday morning (I have crazy mixed emotions about this...it's a topic for another blog completely). So I've gotta read! And buy yellow leggings for "Superhero night" tomorrow. I'm going to be Mighty Mouse, and I'm excited about it! :) AND I have to find/buy something for my sister's wedding shower which is on Satuday as soon as I get back into town. Fun times. Geez Louise!

PS: If you go to FBA, and don't know the Haines family...shame on you. They are fantastic. Another fantastic thing?? "Julie and Julia".

for eternity. all my heart will give. all the glory to Your name.

2009-06-19T15:52:00.001-05:00

I love visitors. And I love Atlanta. good combo.

Last weekend, my little sisters came and stayed with me. I picked them up outside of Chattanooga on Friday night. We got to Atlanta around midnight. On Saturday, we went to H&M, The Varsity, IKEA, Fellini's Pizza, and hung out with some friends. Sunday we went to church, Chili's, took naps, went to Buckhead Church, and to Parker's host home for dinner. Monday was the first day of VBS, so they went with me and I took them back to Chattanooga on Monday evening. We had a great time, and I'm so glad they came to visit me!

This week was VBS. When I got there Monday morning, I thought I'd be helping with recreation. Soon after that, I found myself teaching a 4-year-old class. It actually turned out to be pretty fun, but it was also completely exhausting. It's now Friday afternoon. I'm laying on Amanda's couch watching Law & Order SVU and blogging. Maclane, Amanda, Parker, Kerrie, Samuel, Anna, and I met the SLU 101 group from Two Rivers at The Varsity today. It was good to see everyone! Tonight is Family Night which is basically a mini carnival in the church parking lot. I'm looking forward to it, and hope I have enough energy to buy a funnel cake and ride the swings. :)

And later tonight, the lovely Heather Pierce will be driving to Atlanta to visit me! I think the plan is for us to relax. I am so looking forward to it! I need some good Heather time.

For now...it's nap time. :)

Beach Camp Ooo Ah Ah

2009-06-07T22:06:00.000-05:00

I couldn't help it. We watched Finding Nemo on the way down to Destin... :)

So beach camp is over. Weird. My whole internship up to this point has all but revolved around this event, and it has now come and gone. In spite of some drama and unfortunate situations that always accompany student events, we had a wonderful week of worship and beach time. I made some new friends, strengthened old friendships, and learned a lot about FBA, myself, and my God. All circumstances aside, I love the students at FBA. My heart breaks for some of them because they don't yet realize how much God loves them. My heart rejoices as I watch others live lives that show the love of our God.

Sometimes when I'm away from a ministerial setting, I wonder if I have to do it...but after a week like this I have to think "how could I not??" Ministry is such an exhausting blessing. It makes my life. Literally. I don't know what I would be without it. I'm afraid of what I would be without it. God is so so so good. How can I not try to show and teach that?

My life was blessed by the other leaders, my fellow staff members, the band (EXODUS), the speaker (Brent Crowe), and the illusionist (Drew Worsham). All of these people have such gloriously huge hearts. It was an incredible privilege to get to serve alongside them for a little while. I'm anxious to worship with all of them again--whether it's on this life or the life yet to come.

Am I tired? Duh. Would I go back tomorrow? Absolutely.

bright lights, big city

2009-05-20T09:36:00.000-05:00

Some people don't consider Atlanta "big", but when you've lived 20 minutes outside of Nashville, TN in an itty bitty town called Pleasant View your entire life like I have...Atlanta is big. I've been here for just over a week, and I love it. Everyone I encounter on a daily basis is wonderful. I have already (in 7 days) learned so much about ministry. I'm overwhelmed by what the rest of the summer could hold.

[Important characters in this story include.... Kristen (girls ministry director), Amanda (student ministry assistant), Parker (co-intern), Maclane (student minister), Andrew (full time intern), Tony (student worship pastor)]

Last Wednesday was my first day in the office. Wednesdays are 12 hour days here at FBA, so I started off with a bang. :) I got into town at 10 on Tuesday night because I kept thinking of things to do in Nashville before I left. I met a little over half of my host family (there are 8 of them. yep. eight.), and unpacked. Then Wednesday was spent doing mostly administrative "welcome to the staff" stuff like getting our badges and filling out paper work. It was glorious. haha. I also discovered on Wednesday that Kristen and I would be taking a trip to Anderson, South Carolina on Thursday. (Surprise!)

Thursday:6:45am:Kristen and I leave for Anderson University--the site of our Girls Retreat this summer. We arrived around 9, after stopping at Starbucks, of course, and had a wonderful morning with Becky Walker--who is potentially the most adorable and loving woman in existence. We fell in love with the campus and feel like God is orchestrating everything perfectly for our little trip in July. There's still so much to do, but we wish it was tomorrow instead of over a month away.

One of the wonderful things about working at FBA is that we have Fridays off. We make up for it by working 12 hours on Wednesdays and 4 hours on Sundays. So Friday and Saturday were wonderful, sleepy days for me. Friday night I had dinner with Parker's host fam and Saturday night their son[Grant] took us to a great pizza place called "Fellini's" and drove us around downtown. It was so relaxing and great. I'm very thankful for the fast friends I've been blessed with here! We finished our Saturday night off at Amanda's apartment eating brownies and watching Saturday Night Live (hosted by Will Ferrell = hilarious).

My first Sunday was a little unusual because it was Senior Recognition day. We have 2 Sunday School hours/services on Sundays, so Andrew and I did a few songs in the first service. Then we had brunch for the seniors and their families, and the second hour was devoted to the Student Choir and the recognition of our seniors. There are lots of them. :) It was a great, celebratory day and we viewed it as a complete success!

Sunday afternoon was spent with my host family. We played Rook and had family movie night. I've been so blessed with a place to stay and such a fun family to spend time with this summer! There are 8 of them, so life is a little like a sitcom most of the time. It's a blast!

Monday was my first real office day. I don't remember much about it... probably because it was Monday. haha. Maclane took us to the pastor/director meeting, so we got to meet some of the pastors and ministry directors on staff. There are so many people here! And they're all wonderful! Monday night was spent at Parker's host home again. This time it was to meet and celebrate a girl named Jackie who is an on campus missionary at the University of Florida.

Tuesday was spent deep inside a bag full of medical supplies that were either covered in cough syrup or outdated... so Amanda and I made a list of things we needed to purchase. It was fun. haha. Also on Tuesday afternoon, a paralyzed man and his wife came to FBA from Raleigh, North Carolina to be baptized. They watch Dr. Stanley on TV, and contacted the church to ask about accomodations for baptism. The staff here was so great and helpful and this man and his wife were able to be baptized together even though it was seemingly impossible. It was a blessing to be a part of something so meaningful to this couple!

And now today... I've been here again for 12 hours. :) I like Wednesdays. Today Amanda and I went to Wal-Mart to get new supplies for the med bag. When we got back, Tony informed me that I would be leading worship tonight since he's been sick for A WHILE now and just went to the doctor today... (Tonight went really well and was very fun!) Then we went on a work lunch thing to celebrate Kristen's 5 year anniversary at FBA and Andrew's 4 year anniversary. We took a church van. Amanda drove. We were headed to the Mall of Georgia where Stephen [the soon to be new associate student pastor] was meeting us for lunch. We were about a mile away when we ran over a drive shaft.

******it's now Sunday...see how much free time I have?? haha.******
so anyway. We ran over a drive shaft. And we got a flat tire. So we spent 90 minutes on the side of the road changing the tire. The van didn't have a complete jack; a Suwanee police officer didn't have a jack; lots of "gentlemen" in large trucks honked at us as they drove by, but didn't stop; Stephen had to bring us the jack in his truck. So we eventually made it to PF Chang's at the Mall of Georgia--where 8 warm and tired people ate lunch. It was an adventure, to say the least!

Thursday was rather uneventful in comparison. We spent a significant amount of time cleaning and moving things in our offices to prepare for Stephen's arrival on Tuesday and the construction that will be done while we're at camp. We also spent some time at Goodwill in the afternoon getting some wonderful clothes for camp. :)

I'm going to try to post again tonight about my crazy weekend. But there's the update so far!! Loves.

i have too much to say...

2009-04-27T11:07:00.000-05:00

Oh man. It is a little after 11am on Monday...
in news unrelated to anything else:

I just watched a girl walk confidently into the men's restroom in the library. She promptly turned around and sheepishly walked out. :)
I need a camera because this blog would benefit greatly from some pictures.
The "word verification" step you have to take to post a comment baffles me. They aren't even real words! What am I verifying?!
I'm thankful that my friends are more consistent bloggers than I have turned out to be. Hopefully this summer I will be better.
I love shoes from GAP. I also love buying shoes. It's a good combo.

Real news--in order of importance--from least to greatest: (I'll use bullets for this too. Why not?)

I am ready for school to be over, but I am not ready for summer. I would like a nap first. I'm really excited about interning at First Baptist Atlanta with Maclane, Parker, and the rest of the wonderful staff this summer, but I do wish I had a small break. As things are, my last final is May 12th at 8am...and my first day in the office in Atlanta is May 13th. This means I have to pack in the midst of finals, and move to Atlanta on Tuesday afternoon(hopefully during a period of less traffic...).
Speaking of school, I have so much going on in the next two weeks. Tomorrow: Abnormal Psychology presentation, Review of "Contemplative Thought and Practice" articles due, Lifespan Development "Mini-Exam #3" due... Thursday: field trip to a Labyrinth, Belmont Undergraduate Research Symposium (BURS) presentation at 8:45pm... Friday: YELLOW ROSE BALL! YAY!... Saturday: work, Sycamore's Band Banquet, Kevin's "Summer's Here" party... Sunday: church, AST Alum Inductions, AST Business Meeting... Monday: Life of Christ Presentation, last Monday at J's... May 5: last day of classes... May 6: Dead Day aka pack up my life day... May 7: Lifespan Development Final, Life of Christ Final Paper Due, last real day of work at J's... May 8: History and Systems of Psychology Final, Abnormal Psychology Final, BGM Fundraiser... May 9: Nick's Graduation Party, Alayna's Prom... May 10: Mother's Day, Last Sunday at Two Rivers, last day at J's... May 11th: finish packing up my life day... May 12th: Contemplative Thought and Practice Final, drive to Atlanta... GEEZ LOUISE!! In the midst of all of this, I should probably study...

This part is too important for a bullet...

Here I am. Convicted, yet again. This time by a sticker. haha. Yesterday, my mom had these Bible verse stickers for her 5 year old Sunday School class. Autumn and I, of course, put them on. The ones we chose said "I cannot stop talking about Jesus. Acts 4:20". My friend, Brian, made the comment that we shouldn't have to wear stickers for people to know that. How true! The actual verse says (starting in verse 13...) is:

"Now when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, and perceived that they were uneducated, common men, they were astonished. And they recognized that they had been with Jesus. But seeing the man who was healed standing beside them, they had nothing to say in opposition. But when they had commanded them to leave the council, they conferred with one another, saying, "What shall we do with these men? For that a notable sign has been performed through them is evident to all the inhabitants of Jerusalem, and we cannot deny it. But in order that it may be spread no further among the people, let us warn them to speak no more to anyone in this name." So they called them and charged them not to speak or teach at all in the name of Jesus. But Peter and John answered them, "Whether it is right in the sight of God to listen to you rather than to God, you must judge, for we cannot but speak of what we have seen and heard."

Why? Why? Why? are we so ignorant? We don't need stickers. We have voices and lives. What is wrong with us? What is wrong with me? I'm sorry, Lord, that I have somehow found a way to keep silent. Let it last no longer!

Love to all who read. :)

God knows what I need... You know what I need.

2009-04-05T22:29:00.000-05:00

I have recently been highly convicted about the time that I spend on facebook. So, with it being Palm Sunday--the beginning of a week where My Savior literally gave up His life for me-- I'm giving up facebook for Him. For now, it's only for the week...kind of a nice cap on lent...but we will see where we are next Sunday night. I'm hoping, and have full faith, that this will be the beginning of a less time consuming friendship between me and facebook. I have actually been called the T-Rex of facebook before. No lie. I think it was because I showed up on this person's newsfeed all the time even though we weren't friends. Don't worry. We are now. haha. Instead of facebook, I'll be carrying my pocket sized Bible in my purse, and anytime I have the urge to check someone's profile or confirm my friend requests... I'm going to read David's power ballads and Paul's cool missionary stories instead. I still have facebook mobile, so it isn't gone completely, and I can get important messages. But that also means I'll only be practicing defensive facebooking this week. If you need me, call me. It's so much more personal than blue and white websites. (ps i like texting too) I'll still be on a computer because I have a paper due on Tuesday, and my teachers like to communicate through e-mail. I'll probably blog a bit too.

In other news, I have wonderful friends. They have literally come out of the woodworks since all this break-up crap happened. I am an extremely blessed girl (almost) from coast to coast. How exciting!

In still more news... I'm facing a potentially awkward situation. My sorority formal is coming up, and I have to decide if I'm taking a date by the 13th. That's a week from tomorrow for my dense readers... when I had a boyfriend who lived out of town, I was totally not concerned about going alone. Now that thought makes me want to throw up. Now that I am, once again, not dating anyone, I don't want to go alone. But who do I ask??? Can I take a good girl friend of mine?? Is that allowed? haha. Should I ask a good guy friend? I feel like it would be awkward, but I don't know. Should I just go alone?? Arggg. Dilemmas.

Oh well. It's Passion Week. There are more important things to think about between now and next Monday.

2009-04-01T23:53:00.001-05:00

first of all, i cannot take credit for these words. they came from the lovely Kim Thomas at The Village Chapel's Tuesday night women's Bible Study... but, oh boy, did they ever speak to my soul!

this was the 3rd of a 4 week series leading up to Easter...the topic? Deserts: what it means, how we get there, what's the point, etc...Here is what my notes say:

Deserts

What keeps us in the desert? What are we missing? We're underfed...underthriving.

We have to get over ourselves and wade through the storms and sit in the deserts.

Some form of desert is mentioned over 300 times in Scripture...mostly referring to a Spiritual drought.

Deserts can be an incubator for growth. (David...Jesus...You and Me)

The Metaphor:

uncultivated wilderness--lack of productivity; barren; no fruit; no growth
waterless place--dry; nothing flowing; land of no resource
solitary place--loneliness; no distractions; rest; quiet; boring

Deserts can be good, or they can be bad.

Does God always bring you out of the desert?

yes, but maybe not in this lifetime...

How do we get there?

carelessly wander (sometimes intentional due to rebellion or disobedience...needs repentance)
led by the enemy (Spiritual Warfare)
led by God (time of refinement)

Dangers:

Heat--we are tempted, tested, and tried
Dehydration--we are not Spiritual camels; it doesn't take much to become dehydrated; dehydration effects your mind too
falls, sprains, breaks due to rough terrain--making bad decisions or choices

Be hypervigilent...there's no safe place to step, just less dangerous places.

Benefits:

Hope is renewed. Isaiah 35:1-4
Newness. Isaiah 43:18-19 -- God is making us holy; drawing us closer to Him.
Thirsty for the Lord. Psalm 42:1-4
Resets us. Psalm 42:5-8 -- Things you don't need are lost. Things you do need are saved.
Reminds us. Psalm 107:1-9

We only recognize these as blessings after we've been in the desert.

Deserts remind us of our want and need for God.

The story of the Bible begins in a garden, runs through the desert, and ends with a new heaven and a new earth -- the opposite of the desert.

One other thing Kim said that really resonated with me is that we are always asking God for something or waiting on Him. When we are in the desert, we ask for rain and water. When the floods come, we ask when the rain is going to stop... we are such whiners! I want to embrace the seasons of my life no matter what they look like. Hope you will too.

waking up is hard to do; sleep is impossible too...

2009-03-17T13:15:00.000-05:00

I need to recharge. I need a break after my spring break because my break was filled with tears and difficult conversations and the ending of an almost year long relationship. I'm broken...

...but I won't be forever. I know the Lord can and will restore my heart. He is teaching me that through His word and His children. I have been reminded of how wonderful my friends are, and that there are still people who love me.

There are Psalms that I think of as the "power ballads" of the Bible, and that's where I've been recently...specifically Psalm 34. David wrote it when he was thanking the Lord for protecting him from Abimelech when he was running from Saul. David chose to take matters into his own hands and pretend to be insane so they wouldn't kill him, but God protected him anyway. This psalm is David's power ballad of thanksgiving:

I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips.
My soul will boast in the Lord; let the afflicted hear and rejoice.

Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt his name together.

I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.

Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.

This poor man called, and the Lord heard him; he saved him out of all his troubles.

The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them.

Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.

Fear the Lord, you his saints, for those who fear him lack nothing.

The lions may grow weak and hungry, but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.

Come, my children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the Lord.

Whoever of you loves life and desires to see many good days,

keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies.
Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.

The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their cry;

the face of the Lord is against those who do evil, to cut off the memory of them from the earth.

The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and
saves those who are crushed in spirit.

A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all;

he protects all his bones, not one of them will be broken.

Evil will slay the wicked; the foes of the righteous will be condemned.

The Lord redeems his servants; no one will be condemned who takes refuge in him.

So I'm recharging through the strength and redemption of my Father. I hope to be back on a normal sleeping schedule very soon and thrown fully into the swing of school things sooner than that. I'm not okay. But I know I will be because I know the Lord is not one to just leave me hanging...

RHS--Restless Heart Syndrome...

2009-03-05T02:11:00.000-06:00

I've been convicted lately about a lot of things. The most prevolent in my mind is the fact that I don't talk nearly as much as I used to. For those of you who know me, that may have caused a laugh... I still talk just as much--maybe more--but what I'm saying is worth less. I used to put stock in my words. I used to give advice that didn't come from a textbook. It came from my heart. I miss those words and the deep friendships that blossomed from them. I'm in the process of attempting to reconnect with that part of myself and that conversational part of God. I get so busy that I talk at God instead of to God--so what then do I glean from the experience?? A tired mind and a restless heart. I want a renewed mind and a full, contented heart so that I can pour into those around me. Pray for me.

No vacancy. My brain is full.

2009-02-23T22:04:00.000-06:00

I have 5 billion thoughts floating in my head right now. No lie. The past couple of days have been hard for multiple reasons that I'll spare you from. Today was better though.

I went to my first class, and it only lasted for about 15 minutes. I love when that happens.
I spent my surprise free time in the library. There I sent an email that was a little bit freeing. Don't worry. I sent it to a person that can handle it. I think. I hope.
At 10, I had a wonderful conversation about life and boys and girl stuff and grad school and moms and all sorts of other things with my friend Heather. She's great, and we share a lot of common viewpoints. I think ours is a friendship that will last after Belmont. I wish we had hung out sooner, but God's timing is perfect. I've needed a good friend here for some time since my best friends live in different cities. So I'm very thankful for Heather.
I went to my 11 o'clock class and I participated. What makes it better is that what I said made sense!
Then I went to lunch with great people.
I hadn't gotten my training schedule yet for this week, so I wasn't sure if I had to work tonight or not. Good news though. My next training day is Wednesday, so I have time to get my shirt clean (whoo-hoo!) and study for my day 4 test!
I took clothes to the dry cleaners for the very first time today. I was a little unsure of how it all worked, but I'll probably be frequenting the cleaners pretty often. I'm already going back tomorrow to get my shirts. :)
I've spent the rest of this evening looking at grad schools and an apartment I won't need for about another year. It's a little overwhelming to think about moving away from home. So I'm glad I have a little time.
I also had some great, hilarious conversation with my little sister, Autumn, tonight. She's ridiculously funny. For example, she sent me a piece of flair on facebook tonight that said "JK, JK, L, M, N, O, P". That's the kind of humor she has. She's very clever.

Today has been a good day. I hope it ends well.

My boyfriend is a little bit sassy. Don't get confused. He's not the least bit feminine, but he has an attitude of his own. It keeps life interesting. It's almost been a full 6 months since he moved to Michigan. (Did I mention we have a long distance relationship??) He'll be finished with school in 6 months too. I miss him all the time. We've had some hard times lately. Both of us are at fault. Long distance is so hard, but I know if we can make it through this...we can make it through anything. I'll probably be moving to wherever he is after I graduate from Belmont in December. That seems far away, but it's also closer than I ever thought it would be. And it just keeps getting closer... It will be so great for us to live in the same city again though. So I have some time to prepare, and that is a blessing!

God is so good! I'll leave you with a verse tonight.

"But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, which shines brighter and brighter until full day." Proverbs 4:18

I feel like my path is getting a little brighter...

Loves.

i miss the sound of your voice...the loudest thing in my head

2009-02-18T23:43:00.000-06:00

So there's this boy. And I wish so much that God's plan included us living in the same city right now. I know that God's timing and plans are perfect, but this is really hard. Due to a combination of the aforementioned crazy-busy week that I am drowning in, and his crazy film school life...we haven't gotten to really talk much lately. I mean there's the small talk, the text messages, and the mundane details of our lives, but I want some quality conversation. What I want more than that though is to be able to just sit close to him and not say anything. You girls who get tons of time (or any face time) with your boyfriends don't realize just how lucky you are. The boy says I should move to wherever he is when I graduate in December, get a job, and support him. He's funny like that. :) I miss him all the time. I'm a bit sappy. My apologies.

In other news, I'm sleepy and every part of my body (including my hair) hurts. And it's off to work again tomorrow. I like my new job. It's really very fun, and the people there are interesting. haha. I'm nervous, of course, because I'm new. But I think I'll be okay.

For now I must leave you and write 5 pages about Martin Luther's contribution to the contemplative life. Glorious, isn't it?

My first day as a blogger

2009-02-18T15:28:00.000-06:00

I've been wanting to start a blog for some time now, and thanks to the constant urging from my b. friend, Katarina, today is the day. It just happens to be the middle of the busiest week of my life to date. I'm training for my new job every night except tonight, and going to school every day. On top of just going to class, I had a test Monday, an outline due this morning, and a research paper due tomorrow morning. Plus I drove to Atlanta on Saturday, and drove home Sunday. Needless to say, I'm a little tired. I'm learning a lot though, and I'm excited about my new job AND my new blog!

Anyway, I'm Alicia. I'm a senior at Belmont University, and I'm graduating in December (i'm taking a victory lap). I love Jesus a whole lot, but He loves me more. I sing more than most people. My favorite foods are cheese and bread. I have a crazy family, a wonderful boyfriend, and the very best friends. I'm a blessed girl.